Being Yourself

A lot of things are going through my head and I can't get them together. It's like random bubbles popping up everywhere and I just can't connect them. So this is going to be all over the place haha..

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."~ Dr. Seuss

Few weeks ago, I was and still somewhat am engaged in some new hobbies (snowboarding, watching NBA, cheering Canada on for Olympics, going out for dinner frequently and etc). I couldn't tell whether I wanted to try something new or I just want to find that common interest with that person. Even though I did enjoy those hobbies, but underneath, I felt like I was conforming to that person. I was becoming more like him or her and less of myself.

"I've become so numb I can't feel you there
Become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

And I know I may end up failing too
But I know you were just like me
With someone disappointed in you"

The song just popped up in my head.

When there is a common topic/interest you guys can talk about, you feel more engaged in the conversion and more accepted into their worlds. Maybe this is a form of avoiding rejection. You want to do whatever makes the person happy. But are you happy yourself or happy that he/she is happy?

No one should conform to nobody, otherwise everyone would be the same and the world would be a boring place to be. Sometimes, it takes a little courage being yourself. You are not the same person when you are at home youtubing than when you're in class. You are not the same person when you're in DP studying than when you're partying. But all of them is you. I think it just depends which part you are more willing to display. It's not really faking it, but rather not showing the entire truth?

I felt like I lost myself on the way of finding others' acceptance. During reading week, I have slowly pulled myself away from these people. I need to find myself again before talking to them. I think I'm slowly finding myself back (I miss me).

I agree with Dr. Seus' quote. You don't need to be a copy to be liked because they aren't truly liking you. I will cherish those people who like me because I am me.